My heart is continually being broken. Every single day I find my heart being stolen more and more by the kids I work with, as I have more conversations with them, and see them a little more clearly. But it hurts to love them this much. To see how much pain they’ve gone through in their short lives, and to know what their current lives are like, and yet to be able to do nothing for them physically. To hold and love on the children who are desperate for love and attention, and at the same time reach out to the older kids who have just as much hurt and pain and a desire to be loved, but who try to be strong and reject help and love from others. It just breaks my heart. But it also drives me to my knees. In a situation where I feel so helpless I have no choice but to turn to my Father and give it over to Him. And while it hurts, I know I have a purpose in loving these kids and bringing them before my God, even if I personally never see fruit result. God is at work. He has called me to be His hands and feet and to love these precious children and to fight for them through prayer. I have been hit with the realization that I am simply a broken vessel. I am so broken, not only in the sense that my heart breaks and hurts for these kids, but also that I have so many flaws and failings and struggle each day. However, my identity is in Christ, and He continues to build me up in that, and this week He impressed upon me this picture of a broken vessel. To me this means that, yes, I am broken, but I am God’s vessel! His precious creation whom He loves, has breathed His very Spirit into, and who He can and does use to do His work. He is beyond wonderful.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
